Today I’m hosting a stop on the Parts & Wreck Virtual Book Tour via Bewitching Book Tours. If you’re a fan of fun and snarky paranormal romances you’ll want to add this one to your lists. Author Mark Henry is here with a holiday-themed guest post and a giveaway so let’s give him a welcome…Happy Monday!
Mark Henry’s Weird Holiday Traditions
Anyone who’s read my first paranormal romance, PARTS & WRECK, about love amongst the surgical exorcists of a secret organization, will not be surprised to learn that around the Henry household, even during the holidays, stuff has a tendency to get a little weird. We’re a traditional bunch at heart, though. In fact, I wrote this in the amber glow of the Christmas tree lights, I only had to kick a few elves away from my seat, but they’re the lazy ones and always glue the doll heads to the top of the matchbox cars. They won’t be missed.
So here are a few of our holiday traditions. They’re tried and true and I hardily recommend them…if you’re slightly off-kilter and/or have had a traumatic brain injury.
Dina Martina 
Every year, while parents bind their kids in uncomfortable dress-up clothes and make them sit through mind-numbing small town productions of the Nutcracker or A Christmas Carol, we gather all of our foul-mouthed friends and head up to Seattle to catch that butter-throated songstress, Dina Martina. Her holiday spectaculars are truly a sight (and sound) to behold as is her glorious polyester clad camel toe. Ahem. Pardon me…Christmas camel toe.
Rancid Listerine Party 
One year, we got word—and I’m in no way making this up—that People magazine was interested in covering our yearly holiday party. Our social group has been gathering every year since God was a boy and passing around a truly disgusting artifact amidst our white elephant goodies (think enemas, catheters, devices that help ladies pee standing up). The very first year, someone wrapped up a generic bottle of mouth rinse and we were off. Now the dreaded bottle signals who must host the next year…at great expense!
Questionable Ornament of the Year (KISS) 
We normally pick up a few odd ornaments over the course of the year, little devils, robots, GENE SIMMONS. Yeah, that’s right. Gene Simmons is our latest acquisition and he’s taking a cherished position on our tree. I’ll drink a heavily-spiked cup of eggnog to his honor later.
Now, somehow, despite the abundance of weird, I feel like there’s something missing that’s where you come in. Familiarize yourself with my thought processes (a quick reading of PARTS & WRECK, available now for a low-low price) and suggest some weird traditions in the comment thread. I’m open and willing to embrace your particular brand of nuts—that is not a scrotum euphymism, I’m not touching yours or your partner’s testes (unless you buy my book, then bring them over, I have latex gloves).
ABOUT THE BOOK…
Title: Parts & Wreck
Author: Mark Henry
Genre: Paranormal Romance
Publisher: Entangled Covet
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Wade Crowson, a brutish and brooding playboy and veteran vivisectionist for the Parts Department, runs into more than he bargained for in new partner, Lucid Montgomery, a quirky beauty with a bizarre secret and a string of psychiatric diagnoses she tries hard to keep hidden.
Loving Luce will stamp a demonic target on her back and thrust Wade into a frenzied whirlwind of hilarious misunderstandings and, quite possibly, a stripping gig for emptynesters. Can they withstand the savagery of an exorcism (with or without the split pea soup) and come out alive and …in love?
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About Mark Henry
Mark Henry traded a career as a counselor to scar minds with his fiction. In stories clogged with sentient zombies, impotent sex demons, transsexual werewolves and ghostly goth girls, he irreverently processes traumatic issues brought on by premature exposure to horror movies, an unwholesome fetish for polyester and/or witnessing adult cocktail parties in the swingin' 70s. A developmental history further muddied by surviving earthquakes, typhoons, and two volcanic eruptions. He somehow continues to live and breathe in the oft maligned, yet not nearly as soggy as you’d think, Pacific Northwest, with his wife and four furry monsters that think they’re children and have a complete disregard for carpet.
Giveaway provided by author
Thanks for the giveaway!